If you are a mom – take care of yourself. It's your responsibility
It does not matter, 5 years old child, 25 or 40, if you are a mother, your task does not change: you accommodate feelings, extinguish fear, give stability. There is…

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Parents, don't teach us to live!
The question came: "How to make it clear to her husband's parents that the son has grown up, married and he has his own family! it is not necessary for…

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On the women's separation from parental figures
In fact, the separation of women is not a prerequisite for a happy marriage, as much as the separation of men from their mothers, but, of course, it is a…

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“arriving” affects

Family vampires: one controls, the other sabotages

I’m sure it’s really very hard and unpleasant, when you are used as a trash can for the disposal of negative emotions. And in his own home.

But what does control have to do with it? Let’s see where the controllers come from-fans of the apartment scale.

For example, in the parent family, a person had blurred boundaries. This means that the excitement went freely from one family member to another and in a circle, closing most often on the child. Under the excitation of I mean exclusively characteristic of neural processes, most often it manifests itself in the form of anxiety.

Take a specific situation. For example, the mother wronged mother-in-law, mother got angry, felt worthless, a bad mother and the list goes on. It is with this anger she could not cope. And then she caught sight of a child. Of course, it was all his fault. He’s misbehaving, thus giving a reason to devalue my grandmother’s mother (i.e. his sister-in-law). And here is “extreme” becomes already child: he or she feels bad boy or girl. Especially if mom said something like, “useless daughter” or “Terrible son of mine.”

But the mother directly and not to swear, and begin to very much worry about what the child coughs, later returns home, not learning… well, no matter what it is – the main thing is to survive. Continue reading

Happy family model: where to get it?
The ability to model, imitate, adopt the skills of other people is one of the basic skills of any person. Let us remember how a small child learns: he watches.…

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Parents, don't teach us to live!
The question came: "How to make it clear to her husband's parents that the son has grown up, married and he has his own family! it is not necessary for…

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Beliefs that shape co-dependence
I remembered a distant childhood. Anything I say ideas, opinions, views, objections close ended met with "what you know...", "you're a baby, you warthog". I felt devalued and humiliated, ashamed…

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Violations of hierarchy in the family system. What parents should not do with their children
Hierarchy Hierarchy is one of the parameters of the family system, designed to establish order, to determine the affiliation, authority, power in the family and the degree of influence of…

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