Avoid toxic people, including toxic relatives
The decision not to contact a family member is deeply personal. For some of us, healing a mother's wound is only possible through contact with the mother. In this scenario,…

Continue reading →

Invisible girl, or Cigarettes in exchange for mom's love
Deaf, stupid, impotent rage covered Olga with a concrete slab. Can't breathe, can't get enough air. How tired she was of all these papers, people, negotiations, endless parental "need", "we…

Continue reading →

Home comfort – it's not scrubbed floors, and scrubbed from the beliefs of the head
Such words I heard from my husband, in response to accusations that he does not appreciate my efforts to maintain the household. It was at the very beginning of our…

Continue reading →

boundaries

Traps that are easy to get into, sincerely wishing happiness to their children

– My mother continues to own my life. I resent that! What am I to do?
– How old are You?
– 26.
– You live with your mother?
– No, she bought me and my husband an apartment.
– Who issued?
– She, she’s afraid we’ll break up and he’ll take half.
– Are you financially independent from your mother?
Not really. I’m not working, I have a child for almost three years, and with gardens to the problem. And actually, I think that a woman should be with child, to create coziness at home!
Yeah, right. And my mother still helps somehow?
– Well, she takes her granddaughter when I need to go out or get some rest. Give gifts. We also went to Cyprus for my birthday, and my daughter was left with her. Sometimes he buys delicious food, we go to the clinic together, I am very worried, now such doctors, horror. Continue reading

Parents, don’t teach us to live!

The question came: “How to make it clear to her husband’s parents that the son has grown up, married and he has his own family! it is not necessary for him now to decide to go to the other (not saying someone else, but simply another family) family and it is not necessary to impose the son of their point of view?”.

The question, as you know, from a woman. Women are usually more sensitive in such matters – they understand better that the interventions described above rarely lead to anything good, and therefore try to minimize them somehow.

Well, I’ll try to answer.

Breaks in half
Let’s start with a short theory – parents naturally strive to improve the lives of their children, this is normal and in some sense inevitable. Parents often intervene for the best of intentions. And if parents see that the marriage of their son (daughter) is not very successful (in their opinion), they tend to intervene.

In some cases, such intervention may be reasonable and useful (for example, if there is physical violence), but much more often the intervention of parents spoils everything. Continue reading

Irina Mlodik: "old Age – it's time to get paid"
Is it possible to prepare for your own old age and how to behave with elderly relatives? This is the story of a psychologist, author of books and articles on…

...

Happy family model: where to get it?
The ability to model, imitate, adopt the skills of other people is one of the basic skills of any person. Let us remember how a small child learns: he watches.…

...

The art of raising a slave
Have you noticed that adults often treat children as an uncomfortable object, which greatly complicates their parental existence? Like an annoying fly that you have to fend off, like a…

...

Dreams of a "normal family". Two sides of the same model
Where do they come from these dreams of an ideal family? From childhood? But not the fact that you would like to live the way your parents lived. Probably the…

...