Do I need to talk to my parents about the past? And what if they deny everything? How to forgive a deceased parent and is it possible to discern in the criticism of a parent’s love? This psychologist Lyudmila Petranovskaya told at the lecture “Children’s insults: is there a chance to establish already spoiled relations?”.
Try not to forgive, but to understand.
They had no resource
Remember that they had a very hard life – work, lack of money, getting food, time-consuming life, standing in queues. Strongly wound parents were not psychologically sensitive and gave children the resource for which they were enough.
They were young and inexperienced
Sometimes it is very useful to remember at what age your parents were at that time. Often they were people 25-26 years old, inexperienced and insecure.
Don’t shut up.
If you feel resentment for the parents, do not be silent about it. It is impossible not to recognize that to you it was bad. For a very long time this topic was tabooed and there was only one option: “Parents are Holy people, they raised you and gave life, they need to love, respect and not complain” or: “If you were bad – it’s your own fault.” Continue reading