Looking for the perfect man
I don't want to write about men. And, first of all, about parents. Oil painting: an ideal, pure soul mother who put life on the child, nurtured, nurtured, raised, gave…

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Looking for the perfect man
I don't want to write about men. And, first of all, about parents. Oil painting: an ideal, pure soul mother who put life on the child, nurtured, nurtured, raised, gave…

Continue reading →

How to separate from my parents or why I don't live the way I want
Emotional separation from parents sometimes requires serious work on themselves in adulthood. About why it is important to separate from parents, what to do with guilt and how to find…

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mother

Do not want or can not: why do adult children stay with their parents?

We often see the codependence of adult children and their parents. The first can not become independent, find themselves and be realized in society. The second instead of personal life trying in their own way to arrange the lives of children. In the end – both are unhappy.

On the one hand, we have decided to laugh at the 40-year-old bachelors living with their parents. On the other hand, there is a favorite of millions in the post-Soviet space from irony of fate. He demonstrates a symbiosis of amazing power with his elderly mother. Living with her all his life, his brides, and not steamed :).

On the one hand, all look down on the old maidens, who after 35 remain in my mother’s apartment. On the other – full of positive cinematic stories about old maids, recall, for example, a school teacher (the well-known film Raikin, as he saved his old teacher from two displaces it from the apartment of the goons).

What do we have as a result? Total codependence of adult children and their parents. The first can not become independent, find themselves and be realized in society. The second – instead of personal life all trying in their own way to arrange the lives of children. In the end, neither are happy. Continue reading

On the women’s separation from parental figures

In fact, the separation of women is not a prerequisite for a happy marriage, as much as the separation of men from their mothers, but, of course, it is a desirable condition.

The necessary conditions for a happy marriage is:
A mother-seraped man. After all, Taim man is difficult to manipulate and manage and such a man will not do it himself;
Woman, free from interact ( settings, beliefs, values) that it is incomplete without a man. That is, it is a woman who feels great as a couple with a man, and without it. After all, such a woman is difficult to manipulate and manage. And a woman like that wouldn’t do that.
And yet, back to the topic of women’s separation, as many of my readers are asked to talk about this process.

In fact, the separation process is much more difficult for girls. Why?

The boy before adolescence is identified with his mother and he will be separated from the mother figure and identified with the father figure in adolescence. Everything is so simple here. Continue reading

Dreams of a “normal family”. Two sides of the same model

Where do they come from these dreams of an ideal family? From childhood? But not the fact that you would like to live the way your parents lived. Probably the opposite. So how do you know what a family should look like? Your family?

Family is where you feel good. Where all your needs are met. It is a Paradise on earth.

Each of us had a heavenly time. That’s when we were little. Also there were big, adult people who for us solved everything and dealt with all our problems. If they were more or less good parents, then we had enough security and freedom.

One of the women’s dreams of an ideal family is the hope that my husband will replace my mom and dad.

What is it I can be like a stone wall, protected as a child from all the problems of the big world. I’ll be nice in return. Good, but not at all capricious. I will do what I like, but “on time to do my homework”, I will cook and clean the apartment, I will watch and take care of the children. If I decide to work, it will be rather my “hobby”, and with this money, I will be able to buy myself “ice cream”, but this is definitely not the money that you can buy clothes or eat for a month. And “up there” will be a big and grown man who will take all the important decisions, take care of me, my life and our children. And if in my childhood it was my father and mother, now there will be a husband. Continue reading

My mother always said...
In a sense, every family is a little Prim England with its own traditions. They can relate to relationships, leisure, life... Tried and tested by generations, such rules simplify life.…

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Such a common story...
Part 1. Lyrical She calls her mother every day – morning and evening. She is the woman of a little over thirty, successfully (happily?) married, with two educations, now on…

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Two in the boat, not counting the crisis
From ancient Greek "crisis" is translated as "decision, turning point, turning point, time of transition". Crises lead us up a spiral, to development and depth in relationships. When a couple…

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Sacred marriage or why do we need a Sacred marriage or why do we need a family??
"Marriage is not a good thing to call" – says the famous aphorism. And about the destruction of the institution of modern marriage, and about the statistics of divorce, and…

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