I do not like who I live with, how I live, and the future that awaits me
Writes me Tatiana: Olga, good afternoon. Please analyze your situation and state of mind. I am 32 years old, married 10 years, child 4 years. There are all the attributes…

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My mother always said...
In a sense, every family is a little Prim England with its own traditions. They can relate to relationships, leisure, life... Tried and tested by generations, such rules simplify life.…

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Dreams of a "normal family". Two sides of the same model
Where do they come from these dreams of an ideal family? From childhood? But not the fact that you would like to live the way your parents lived. Probably the…

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vampires

Family vampires: one controls, the other sabotages

I’m sure it’s really very hard and unpleasant, when you are used as a trash can for the disposal of negative emotions. And in his own home.

But what does control have to do with it? Let’s see where the controllers come from-fans of the apartment scale.

For example, in the parent family, a person had blurred boundaries. This means that the excitement went freely from one family member to another and in a circle, closing most often on the child. Under the excitation of I mean exclusively characteristic of neural processes, most often it manifests itself in the form of anxiety.

Take a specific situation. For example, the mother wronged mother-in-law, mother got angry, felt worthless, a bad mother and the list goes on. It is with this anger she could not cope. And then she caught sight of a child. Of course, it was all his fault. He’s misbehaving, thus giving a reason to devalue my grandmother’s mother (i.e. his sister-in-law). And here is “extreme” becomes already child: he or she feels bad boy or girl. Especially if mom said something like, “useless daughter” or “Terrible son of mine.”

But the mother directly and not to swear, and begin to very much worry about what the child coughs, later returns home, not learning… well, no matter what it is – the main thing is to survive. Continue reading

Parents
In order to endure childish affection, which may seem clingy and annoying, as well as children's affects like outbursts of hatred for younger brothers and sisters, and children's whims, and…

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Marriage of convenience: the truth about a relationship without feelings
Is there any sense in a marriage of convenience in contemporary reality? On this topic argues Gestalt therapist Andrew Yudin. There is such an interesting phenomenon in psychology: human stereotypes…

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Five reasons why unloved daughters choose the wrong partners
"How come I married a man who is a copy of my mother? It seemed that he did not look like her, and in the end – just like her.…

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12 ways to forgive grievances parents
Do I need to talk to my parents about the past? And what if they deny everything? How to forgive a deceased parent and is it possible to discern in…

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