10 myths about married life
The idea of this article came to me after a seminar on systemic family psychotherapy, which led the Guru to work with families Elena Burtseva. Based on her many years…

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What is the crisis of marriage institution and what it eats
Tons of classical literature and kilometers of film melodramatic films created the illusion of great and pure love, which certainly ends in marriage and further "they lived happily ever after."…

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I do not like who I live with, how I live, and the future that awaits me
Writes me Tatiana: Olga, good afternoon. Please analyze your situation and state of mind. I am 32 years old, married 10 years, child 4 years. There are all the attributes…

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working with couples

Formula of love for prisoners of marriage

Have you ever thought about the beautiful phrase” Marriages are made in heaven”, the key word “are made”?

“Prisoner – a person who is in the place of detention, in respect of which detention is chosen as a preventive measure” (C).

Despite the fact that I have great respect for the institution of marriage, sometimes, after working with couples, I have a strong feeling that I am a prison psychologist, and my clients – prisoners, many years spent in isolation, inside the “close suffocating space of the wedding ring”, rattling the chain of cast-iron core and through the bars occasionally admiring the “sky of freedom in the cage”, and I – at the same time the defense lawyer, the Prosecutor and the judge, who must pass the final sentence of their love Union…

But, in fact, one of the first questions I ask myself in my mind when taking a couple is not “Who is to blame?”, and even: “Not that to do?”rather, “What is the level of emotional maturity of each spouse?”.

And this maturity has nothing to do with age, life experience, financial situation and professional achievements. It is rather about the strength of the individual, the degree of maturity of each, the willingness to take responsibility for their lives, the ability to change the usual style of thinking – to look not in others, but in themselves the cause of their problems, the ability to see the “picture” as a whole, not trying to trap the guilt of Another, closing in their grievances. Continue reading

Home comfort – it's not scrubbed floors, and scrubbed from the beliefs of the head
Such words I heard from my husband, in response to accusations that he does not appreciate my efforts to maintain the household. It was at the very beginning of our…

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Children and cuisine: risks of the "new Patriarchate"
The women of Victorian England were almost invisible to the law. The term "male person" (male person), which denoted a full-fledged person, brought gentle ladies in corsets beyond the legal…

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How to separate from my parents or why I don't live the way I want
Emotional separation from parents sometimes requires serious work on themselves in adulthood. About why it is important to separate from parents, what to do with guilt and how to find…

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Family vampires: one controls, the other sabotages
I'm sure it's really very hard and unpleasant, when you are used as a trash can for the disposal of negative emotions. And in his own home. But what does…

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