"Why didn't you leave me?!"Notes of the psychotherapist
My wife and I haven't slept together in 8 years. – He said he jumped into the hole. Almost there. Apparently, long leader was coming with the spirit of, to…

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My mother always said...
In a sense, every family is a little Prim England with its own traditions. They can relate to relationships, leisure, life... Tried and tested by generations, such rules simplify life.…

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A life that wasn't meant for me
What can you do for me? What does life look like that I can live? What is my measure of well-being and happiness? What is my "share" and what is…

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Husband

Aging relatives. The tragedy of time

Aging is a multidimensional process, but more often the focus is on the medical aspect of late-age changes. However, for family members, the aging of relatives is a much more complex problem than the physical ailments and diseases themselves. Relatives often find it difficult to cope with feelings of irritation, guilt, to overcome alienation.
Aging of relatives is not only a part of their life cycle, but also a part of the family life cycle. Aging relatives require special treatment, care and love. The situation of aging relatives is normal, all families meet with it one way or another, and each family must get out of this crisis. How? It depends on a number of factors: the previous relationship of family members, their tolerance, selfishness, empathy, maturity, anxiety, financial condition of the family, the characteristics of employment, etc.

It is important to inform family members about the phenomenon of old age, its physiological, emotional and existential nature. Without knowledge of this problem, it is difficult for relatives to build functional, careful relationships with aging relatives. Old age is characterized by some features of the internal and external order, one of which – the closeness of death. Continue reading

Cheating and 5 needs in marriage

Adultery is a marker, a symptom of an unhappy marriage. Adultery can talk about the unmet needs of spouses in marriage. Without getting something in the family, the spouse is looking for it on the side.

Not every family can overcome treason. Therefore, it is easier to engage in marital relations at the first “bells” of dissatisfaction than to subject your marriage to such a test.

American researcher, author of “His needs, her needs: building a marriage without change” Willard Hadley conducted an experiment involving more than 800 couples and identified the basic needs of men and women in marriage, the satisfaction of which, the spouses consider each other irresistible.

Thus, there are five needs in marriage, the satisfaction of which sharply reduce the possibility of adultery. Here they are:

1. Women have a need for tenderness. When a man gives a woman flowers , hugs her, kisses her, holds her hand, the woman feels that the partner loves her as a woman. Continue reading

How to separate from my parents or why I don’t live the way I want

Emotional separation from parents sometimes requires serious work on themselves in adulthood.

About why it is important to separate from parents, what to do with guilt and how to find a “Golden mean”, says psychologist and trauma therapist Ksenia Wittenberg.

Relationship with parents is a problem for most

About a third of all client requests are about relationships with parents.

Forces withstand this truth, to agree with his drama and to accept its as part of its history. And stop to demand the lost love and care or compensation for the suffering. This is the process of separation.

Begins, usually with such those:
After my mother’s call, I spend half the day depressed, digesting.
Why does she have to put me down as soon as I get better? Continue reading

Do not want or can not: why do adult children stay with their parents?
We often see the codependence of adult children and their parents. The first can not become independent, find themselves and be realized in society. The second instead of personal life…

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Invisible girl, or Cigarettes in exchange for mom's love
Deaf, stupid, impotent rage covered Olga with a concrete slab. Can't breathe, can't get enough air. How tired she was of all these papers, people, negotiations, endless parental "need", "we…

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Avoid toxic people, including toxic relatives
The decision not to contact a family member is deeply personal. For some of us, healing a mother's wound is only possible through contact with the mother. In this scenario,…

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Do not want or can not: why do adult children stay with their parents?
We often see the codependence of adult children and their parents. The first can not become independent, find themselves and be realized in society. The second instead of personal life…

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