Tons of classical literature and kilometers of film melodramatic films created the illusion of great and pure love, which certainly ends in marriage and further “they lived happily ever after.” And although recent Hollywood movies (not only Arthouse) are beginning to put in the center of the plot the most mysterious thing that follows after the phrase “they lived happily ever after”, in the collective unconscious is strong idea of the ideal “spherical horse in a vacuum”, an ideal marriage that “everyone except me”.
Someone believes that “Romeo and Juliet”, a story about the love-hormonal fever of two 14 – year-olds, which five days after their acquaintance ended in a double suicide, is about love. Someone envious sighs, reviewing for the umpteenth time the movie “Pretty woman” about an insecure man incapable of emotional contact, trying to remove their alarm using a control (money + power) over a known-vulnerable partner.
Yes, of course, a movie or a book about a calm, trusting, open relationship would be boring. Passions and intrigue to experience more interesting. And let it be so, then there are stories. But these images people are beginning seek and in life and disappointed, that unicorns, it turns out, not there is. Continue reading
“Marriage is not a good thing to call” – says the famous aphorism. And about the destruction of the institution of modern marriage, and about the statistics of divorce, and about the new forms of marriage, too, said a lot. Yes, and I have the most experience of two failed marriages, which had to be terminated because of their complete lack of viability. And yet, (and perhaps that is why), I wanted to write an article in defense of marriage, because I have often wondered: why do we need a family? And the people around me, too, have repeatedly doubted the usefulness of this public institution, advocating for different more free forms of cohabitation.
At once we will decide on “virgin persons”, that is with me and some my friends and clients on which experience I intend to rely. I’m not one to whimper, “no man in the house is no life.” I have a good experience of positive loneliness and raising children without their fathers. That is, when I was married, we lived worse in every sense, (and mental, and financial, and in all the others, too). And I still believe that not every marriage should be preserved. And “live for the sake of the children” is also not worth it, the kids will only get worse. Continue reading
The good news is that we can close this unpleasant topic once and for all. The bad news is that you have to grow up very quickly, and – surprise! – to abandon some of their stereotypical expectations.
Don’t expect mom to understand.
While the baby is very small, mom really has a lot to understand: he is cold or hungry, he is interested or he is tired… But the older the person becomes, the harder it desires and the less debt remains at mom’s. In the end, mom is also a person with her own views and limitations, with her life position, and it may not coincide with yours. It’s life.
You can argue your views, but do not get involved in endless disputes! It makes no sense: if mom does not agree with your arguments, it is unlikely to convince her. Fortunately, even in this case, all is not lost.
Normally: with age, a person becomes more independent – but, as you know, sometimes the age comes alone. If you can not provide yourself with the most necessary, including housing and food, the hope that your arguments will be listened to, is rapidly melting. Continue reading